Sweet Poison

New Layout

2010-12-06T01:28:00.000-08:00

Wow! It's been a year!
I finally fix the layout!

It's Tron Legacy. I hope the movie will be awesome!

Need fixing

2009-12-27T22:12:00.000-08:00

Wow! I really need to fix the blog layout later!

Second Chance 2

2008-11-29T06:52:00.000-08:00

Eragon © Christopher Paolini

Warning: Slash, uke Murtagh, me being cruel. --;

Second Chance

Chapter2

“Why did you shut yourself from me?” Saphira asked with an annoyed tone through their mental link.

“I’m sorry…”

Saphira eyes suddenly caught the sight of the sleeping figure wrapped in a dirty blanket in Eragon’s arms. Earlier in the dungeon, Eragon had decided to put Murtagh into a deep sleep by using magic. He didn’t want to fight his brother who kept insisting to stay, while Eragon would not let him.

“I… I thought we have made sure that we have freed everyone…”

“Apparently, we missed this one.”

Eragon moved closer toward Saphira so that she could see the person.

“Is that Murtagh?!”

Eragon nodded.

“But how?”

“I don’t understand that myself.”

“He looks terrible…”

Eragon stared at his brother’s face. Just now he could see it clearly. He couldn’t help but felt pity for his brother. He looked sickly pale and malnourished. Bruises littered his face. And the Empire symbol… Eragon gritted his teeth.

How could they?

“I think we need to find an inn and get his wounds treated before we get back.”

“I agree…”
Eragon stared at Murtagh’s body, which was laid on the bed. He hesitantly pulled the rag that wrapped his brother, slightly afraid of what he might see.

His eyes widened in horror at what came to his eyes. Bruises, cuts, scars, welts, and burns covered his brother’s body. Some were old, some were still fresh. Although he had prepared himself to see those kinds of things on Murtagh as he had vaguely seen in the dungeon, it still shocked him. He couldn’t prevent tears from flowing out of his eyes.

Nearly every part of Murtagh’s skin was bluish purple from bruises. Eragon carefully touched his ribcage and felt several broken ribs. Some had healed themselves in a way they shouldn’t have. If he wished to fix them, he would have to break them once again. As he cast the spell, a loud crack was heard. Eragon bit his lower lip. He then broke another one. Fortunately for Murtagh, he was asleep, so he felt no pain. But what about last time, when they were being broken by Galbatorix?

“Weise Heil.” He said, and the broken ribs healed.

Eragon then examined Murtagh’s arms. One was bent at an odd angle. His shoulders were also dislocated. He continued with checking the lower part of Murtagh’s body. His kneecaps were black, and Eragon was quite sure the skin hid severe bone fractures. And his right shin jutted out of his torn skin. What wrenched his heart the most was when he saw some minor burn on his brother’s manhood.

Even his most ‘sacred’ part was being violated. Eragon thought bitterly.

He lifted Murtagh’s body to see his back. Once again, horror struck him. Earlier, he only paid attention to his scar, which was given by Morzan. But now he saw how messed up his brother’s back was. White scars crisscrossed his whole back. There were some newly healed wounds, and some which were still very fresh. In one he could even see the white bone slightly protruding from the wound. From the looks of it, they hadn’t only used an ordinary whip on him, but also the one with sharp objects at its tips that could rip the flesh when it was being pulled back. And how the scar from Morzan was still so prominent on his back while it should have disappeared under the hundred whip marks, Eragon could only find one answer for that.

They had it reopened. Eragon clenched his fist until it turned white.

In addition to the whip marks, there were also bruises and burns on his back. And some strange things stuck to it here and there. Eragon frowned a bit. They looked like drops of candle wax.

He laid Murtagh back on the bed and went to get some warm water and a small towel. He then started to clean Murtagh’s body. In a short time the white towel turned brown. Eragon cursed. How had he not died from infections?!

Of course it’s magic… he thought bitterly.

After he had finished cleaning Murtagh or at least, he was clean enough before he could take a bath, he healed his wounds. It took a lot of energy from Eragon. Even though he had grown much stronger now, he still couldn’t heal of all his wounds. Murtagh needed a powerful healer to take care of him. But he was afraid that they might have still recognized the red rider. They still misunderstood him. In addition, he had that Empire symbol on his cheek. Even if he wasn’t the red rider, a lot of people hated Galbatorix’s slaves in general.

They were being hated because of their choice to become slaves which, in Eragon’s opinion, wasn’t really a choice. Servitude or death. He couldn’t blame those people for their fear of death. Most of them were just weak villagers whose villages had been destroyed. And for his brother, he didn’t even have a choice in that matter. Eragon was certain, if he had ever had a choice, he would have chosen death. Murtagh knew better than anyone else that death was much more preferable than to live in Galbatorix’s hand.

Eragon had heard from Nasuada that many of the Empire’s slaves ran away and sought the protection of the Varden. However, when they got to the Varden, what they received was imprisonment. The first reason was indeed for protection, because people hated them. The second reason was to prevent a spy, although they could cause no harm. Sometimes, they were forced to become a ‘slave’ to the Varden. Given a job that was wanted by no one without a suitable payment. Even the leader of the Varden couldn’t do much about this. Eragon wasn’t sure if the condition would change after the war. It seemed being a slave for Galbatorix meant being a slave for eternity.

He stroked the symbol on his brother’s face gently. Even with that disgusting thing on his face, Murtagh still looked beautiful. Even though his face was sickly pale and blue with bruises, even though he looked so thin and malnourished, he looked beautiful. Eragon thought he was even more beautiful than when the first time they met. He took a few strands of his hair, it had grown very long. Perhaps that was the thing that had made him look more beautiful, even though it was currently dirty and matted.

He had always loved his brother. But he didn’t realize it, not until his brother’s ‘death’. Before, he had always thought he loved Arya. When he thought Murtagh betray him, he felt so disappointed. He hated him, yet never stopped loving him. After he lost Murtagh, his world seemed to shatter. That time he realized how important he was to him.

Now he had his second chance, Eragon swore he would never let Murtagh leave him again. He would put Murtagh above everything in his life.

Second Chance 1

2008-03-24T05:16:00.000-07:00

Eragon © Christopher Paolini

Warning: Slash, weird pairing, me being cruel. --;

Chapter 1

The Empire had been defeated. King Galbatorix was dead. All people were cheering. Prisoners were set free. Happy tears were spilled as family once again reunited.

Eragon smiled a fake smile as some prisoners and his family thanked him for defeating Galbatorix. While he should be the happiest person for being called the greatest man in Alagaesia now, he could feel nothing but pain and regret. He couldn’t help not to feel jealous as he saw those people finally could be together again with their family. And him? His only remaining family had gone, sacrificed for their freedom.

It had been four years since a messenger brought him a gift from an anonymous sender. He and his friends were so surprised when they found out that it was the last dragon egg. He was in a state of euphoria, especially when the egg hatched for his cousin. However, few days after that, another messenger brought him a news that the king had the red rider executed for defying him. At first, he didn’t believe the king dared to execute his own rider. Not until he saw it with his own eyes.

Flashback

Murtagh’s head was displayed in the town square. His face was covered with bruises and scars as a proof of the torture he had gone through.

“No! It can’t be him! It can’t be him!!” Eragon cried as he struggled to free himself from Roran’s grasp.

“Stop it, cousin! They might recognize us!” Roran hissed as he dragged Eragon away from the crowd which surrounding that horrible display.

After they had finally left the crowd, Roran let go off his cousin. But...

“It can’t be him… It can’t be… I will go back and save him no matter what!”

“Eragon! Don’t be foolish! He is dead!” Roran said sadly.

“NO! The last time, we also thought he was! But he wasn’t! I won’t make the same mistake!”

“You saw it with your own eyes!”

“No…” Eragon fell to his knees and cried.

“Accept it Eragon… At least he died as a hero…”

End Flashback

A hero? No… Murtagh died as the biggest traitor in Alagaesia. First he betrayed the Varden and after that he betrayed Galbatorix to take his throne. That’s what everybody knew. No one knew that he was the one who stole the egg and gave it to the Varden. Galbatorix kept that as a secret so that Murtagh would forever be the shadow of Morzan. And he, Eragon, couldn’t reveal the truth by risking his identity as the son of Morzan to be discovered. Even if he had done so, no one would have believed him.

It was all his fault… He was the main reason of his brother’s suffering, even when he was still in his mother’s womb. If it hadn’t been for him, Murtagh wouldn’t have had to lose his mother, left alone with his abusive father and Galbatorix who ruined his childhood. If it hadn’t been for him, he wouldn’t have had to lose his freedom. He wouldn’t go to the Varden and imprisoned. More importantly he wouldn’t be captured by Galbatorix and unwillingly became his slave.

Guilty overwhelmed him as he remembered what he said to him the last time they met,

“I don’t have a scar on my back anymore”

He had never thought those cruel words would be the last thing he said to his brother. He still hurt him even after he had risked himself being punished for him. He even asked him to die and swore that he would kill him. Now, he really had died for him and he regretted everything. But it’s too late…

It’s too late to say sorry…

He always thought that Murtagh had betrayed him. But now he realized how wrong he had been. Murtagh had never betrayed him, at least not willingly. He stayed loyal to him until the end. He was the one who had betrayed Murtagh.

He left his thought when someone patted his shoulder. It was his cousin, Roran. It seemed he realized the gloomy aura that surrounded Eragon.

“Are you okay?”

Eragon nodded, his expression still hadn’t changed.

“We have freed all prisoners. Let’s go back.”

“He has been free, too.”

Eragon smiled sadly, “I know.” He paused for a while and then talked again “Just go first, Roran. I think I want to look around this place a bit more.”

“Are you sure?” Honestly, Roran didn’t really like the idea of leaving Eragon alone in the place where his brother had been tortured to death.

Eragon nodded

“Don’t worry, Roran. He will be alright.” Saphira suddenly talked “Eragon, take as much time as you want. I’ll wait for you here.”

“Thanks, Saphira…”

“I’ll go then” Roran said as he took his leave.
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Eragon could hardly understand himself why he chose to stay. Looking around the dungeon only made him feel worse. It was dark, very dark. If he hadn’t brought a torch with him, he could have hardly seen anything. The coldness and the stale air made him hard to breathe. The condition alone was enough to make the prisoners lose their hope. Not to mention the torture.

He checked every cell even though everyone had made sure that no one’s left before. Of course they were all empty, but he still checked them one by one. Finally he arrived at the deepest part of the dungeon. Behind the door in front of him must have been the torture chamber. There were two torture chambers in that dungeon. The first one was for ordinary crime and the second was Galbatorix’ private torture chamber which was located in the deepest part of the dungeon and was used only in “special occasion”.

When he opened the door, the first sight which welcomed him was his brother hanged in chains. His body was covered with wounds. Eragon quickly rushed to his side, but he found no one aside of himself.

He laughed bitterly at that. What did he expect? His brother had died four years ago. Four years… Yet still not enough to erase his regret. His haunted face appeared in his dream every time he slept. Every night, he watched him being tortured mercilessly by the king.

Those nightmares were horrible, but they were nothing compared to the reality. This torture chamber was so much worse than the one in his dream. Blood was everywhere, most had already dried. The smell stung his nose, unlike in his dream where he smelled nothing of this. And what scared him the most was the various torture instruments which had never appeared in his dream. Eragon had no idea at all how to use them. He imagined what kind of pain they could have caused as he stared at some rusty metal instruments on the table.

He remembered what Galbatorix told him.

“He knows them all Eragon… He knows every single instrument I have in my torture chamber. I have tried all of them on him”

Eragon overthrew the table angrily. The instruments fell to the dirty floor, producing some loud noises. Eragon punched the wall repeatedly until his hand bleed. He wished he could turn back the time. He had forced his brother to walk the path of destruction while he actually had had so many chances to save him. Now, he cried for one more chance, but he knew it’s too late.

Suddenly the wall in front of him moved, revealing a dark passageway. Eragon was surprised to find a secret passage there although it wasn’t really surprising for Galbatorix to have something like that in his dungeon. Eragon entered the passageway, and examined his surrounding.

There were few cells there. The conditions were so much worse then the part of the dungeon he saw earlier. It was much darker, colder and the smell… He could hardly stand it. The smells of blood, rotten corpse, and shit mixed together. Eragon nearly jumped when he examined a cell and found a skeleton inside of it. He shuddered. It couldn’t be his brother, could it?

The thought was quickly wiped out when he heard chains rattling from one of the cells.

Perhaps it’s just a rat. He told himself. Nevertheless, he moved to check it.

He stared in horror as he found someone inside the cell in the very corner.

“Don’t worry! I will get you out of there!” he said

Damn! I don’t have the key!

“Do you know where the key is?” Eragon asked.

The prisoner didn’t react at all. He just continued to sit there with his head tilted forward that his long matted hair covered his face.

“I guess no…”

Eragon used his sword to destroy the padlock and then he entered. The prisoner still didn’t give any reaction. He looked like he had been dead, but his chest was moving up and down from breathing.

He is alive, but he is no better than dead. Eragon thought.

“Let’s go out” he offered his hand to help the prisoner to stand up, but the prisoner turned himself away from Eragon. He just wrapped a rag, which seemed to be his blanket, around his body tighter.

“Are you okay?” he asked as he touched his face.

When Eragon’s finger made a contact with his skin, the prisoner screamed hysterically. As he tried to kicked and punched Eragon, the rag fell from his body, revealing his naked skeletal body which was covered with scars and bruises.

Eragon pulled his hand back. The prisoner quickly retreated to the corner of his tiny little cell, trying to get as far as he could from Eragon. He curled his naked form there, his hand on his head as if trying to protect it.

God, what have they done to him?

To be completely naked in a place as cold as that only with a dirty old rag that could barely protect him from the cold, did they even consider this man as a human?! To be naked and shackled, only animals deserved that kind of treatment!

Even an animal doesn’t deserve to be starved and beaten like this.

Suddenly Eragon caught a glimpse at a familiar scar on the prisoner’s back which was half hidden by his long hair. It looked similar with the one on Murtagh’s back.

It can’t be!

“Murtagh…?”

The prisoner suddenly looked tense. He miserably tried to avoid Eragon even further.

“It’s you, isn’t it?!”

Eragon grabbed his hand. Again, the prisoner screamed as he tried to get away from Eragon.

“It’s me, Eragon! Don’t you recognize me?!”

“No…” he moaned softly. That was indeed murtagh’s voice.

“Look at me! It’s your brother… Eragon… I won’t hurt you…” Eragon said as he brought Murtagh’s face to face his own.

“No… don’t…” Murtagh muttered although he didn’t give much resistance.

Eragon was utterly shock when he saw his brother’s face. The Empire symbol had been branded on his left cheek which meant he was the king’s possession. Eragon had seen some of Galbatorix’ slaves have it on their body. But to be branded on the face was a total humiliation. Had that thing happened to him, he would have never wanted show his face to anyone ever again.

Murtagh turned his face away from Eragon in shame. Eragon didn’t know what to say to comfort his brother. All he could do was to hold him in his arm.

“No…” Murtagh whimpered, “I’m dirty, Eragon…”

“It doesn’t matter” He hugged him even tighter.

His body was covered with grim and smelled totally like a shit. It looked like he hadn’t had a bath for weeks. Or perhaps months? But it mattered not. For him, Murtagh was like a jewel. A jewel is a jewel that it won’t lose its value just because it is covered by mud.

“You don’t understand… Just leave me.”

Leaving him in such a miserable place? Eragon had never been in a place worse than his brother’s cell. Just to think that someone lived there had made him sick. And that unfortunate someone was his brother, and he had been there for years… And now he asked him to leave him there? Only with a dirty old rag as his only possession?! How could he think that he would be able to do that?

“Let’s leave together, brother.”

“I can’t…”

“Why?”

“I have no other place to go in this world…”

Eragon was silenced. Murtagh might have been right. People thought that he was a traitor. But Eragon knew he wasn’t. And he didn’t deserve to be abandoned in a place such as that. That place was not for human to live in.

It was way too dark and cold and dank. Not to mention the sanitation is really bad. Eragon thought bitterly as he stared at the shit bucket in the corner. The content had overflowed to the grimy floor.

Even if he wanted to stay away from the rest of the world, it would definitely not here.

Or at least not alone…

Murtagh was startled when his brother suddenly sat beside him.

“Wh…what are you doing?!” he asked

“If you choose to stay here, I will stay here as well.”

“Why?”

“I can’t live without you, Murtagh.”

Murtagh turned his back away to Eragon. He brought his arm around his leg and buried his face on his knees. He sobbed quietly. That was the first time in his life Eragon saw his brother crying.

To be by Your Side

2008-03-10T02:49:00.000-07:00

Summary: Cesare was ill and Chiaro wasn’t there for him. It’s up to Volpe to take care of him. Volpe/Cesare.

Warning: Shounen ai, blood, self harm.

Cantarella © Higuri You

Taddeo stared at his master who was writhing on the bed. Cesare had suffered a fever for three days, yet there was still no sign of improvement on his condition. There was no use to call a doctor or gave him some medicines. He knew it was no ordinary illness. Ordinary fever would never cause pain like the one his master suffered. He knew too well, it must have something to do with the demon inside him.

“Chi…a…ro…?” Cesare murmured. He raised his hand slightly as if he was trying to reach something.

Taddeo took Cesare’s hand with his own, “No, master… he is not here…”

It’s ‘him’ again! Why it’s always ‘him’ in his mind?! Why it must be ‘him’?! Taddeo gritted his teeth. As much as he hated to admit, his master needed that man now. He wondered where he was, that damn boy… He was probably having some fun with Cesare’s sweet little sister. Cesare’s mind was always full of him, but his was so full of that woman. Why couldn’t his master realize that there was no space for him in that man’s heart?

Cesare brought his hand to Taddeo’s face and caressed it softly. He smiled an angelic smile with his face still showing a pained expression. Taddeo smiled back sadly at him even though he knew that smile wasn’t meant for him.

“My angel, Michael…” Cesare whispered.

Suddenly Cesare pulled his body closer to him. To make him even more startled, he kissed him! Taddeo didn’t know how to react. He knew his master would never do this in his normal state. He must have mistaken him as Chiaro. Cesare would most certainly have been displeased if he had taken an advantage on this situation. Not that he cared anyway. But still he couldn’t believe he would sink that low to get the man he called master.

However, the temptation was becoming harder and harder to resist when Cesare licking his lips, seeking for an entrance into Taddeo’s mouth. Still unsure what to do, Taddeo hesitantly let him in. Somehow, his tongue tasted so sweet, the kind of sweetness that could never be described. He felt like he was in heaven, while in fact he was with a demon from hell.

After quite sometimes, Cesare slowly withdrew his tongue. However, Taddeo didn’t wish to let that sweetness go away just like that. He pushed his tongue into Cesare’s mouth, exploring every part of it. He knew this wasn’t right. It pained him to realize that Cesare thought he was Chiaro, but he couldn’t free himself from that addictive poison.

Cesare tightened his grip on Taddeo’s back, encouraging the older man even more. Taddeo was too drown into that kiss that he didn’t realize one of Cesare hands had left his back and reached a knife which was laid nearby. Suddenly Cesare sliced his subordinate’s back open with the knife. Taddeo groaned in pain. He was too shocked to do anything that he could only stared into the eyes of the man beneath him and found they were colored gold, which meant Cesare was under the demon’s influence.

He gritted his teeth as he felt Cesare pressed the wound with his fingers and ripped the bloody clothes off. Still wearing the innocent look in his face, Cesare licked his slender fingers which were stained with Taddeo’s blood.

Taddeo was horrified by what his master did. It wasn’t like him… No! It wasn’t him! There were several times Cesare acted like he wasn’t himself, but never like this.

“Cesare…”

He called his master’s name, hoping that he could bring him back to his real self. But Cesare brought his bloody fingers to his lips to silent him. They forcefully entered his mouth, letting him tasted his own blood which mixed with Cesare’s saliva.

Taddeo pulled himself back and moved several feet away from Cesare. Scared…, he hardly ever felt that in his life. But now, he was alone in that room only accompanied by a devil with an angelic face. He wished to leave by now, but he was afraid of what Cesare would do once he left. Especially with that knife still in his hand, who knows he might have harmed himself. He still remembered clearly when Cesare tried to chop his own arm. If he hadn’t come sooner, the boy would have lost his arm.

“Are you going to leave me again?” Cesare asked. His voice was trembling as if he was going to cry.

“Master, I…”

“Don’t lie to me!” Cesare cut him, “I know you too are scared of me! I thought you don’t, but you do! You are just the same as the others!!!” he screamed as hot tears streaming down his beautiful face.

Taddeo watched in horror as Cesare cut his throat with the knife he was holding. He immediately rushed to his side, not caring that he could be poisoned by the blood. To his surprise, the wound had healed itself. Cesare groaned in frustration. He tried to hurt himself more, but Taddeo held his hand preventing him from doing so.

“What do you think you are doing?!!!” Taddeo yelled.

“Let me go!” Cesare cried, trying to release his hand from Taddeo’s grasp.

“NO! Not until you promise not to hurt yourself anymore!”

Cesare struggled to get his hand free from Taddeo, but Taddeo was apparently stronger than him. In his desperate attempt to break free, Cesare stabbed Taddeo’s hand which was holding his. Taddeo jerked his hand, freeing Cesare’s. Cesare made a scratch on his chest, his flesh was ripped along with his white shirt which was now soaked with blood. Frustrated when his new wound closed again, he cried and made another one.

Another one…another one…and another. All he could feel was pain. His eyes were blurred with tears, but it’s not because of the pain he inflicted on himself. His body had gone numb or more likely his physical pain was nothing compared to the other pain he was also suffered at the same time. He couldn’t understand that pain, he had no idea how to make it go away. Somehow, wounding himself made him feel slightly better. But it didn’t last long because his body soon became used to it.

No… it wasn’t because he had been too numb that he didn’t feel the pain… A pair of gentle arms had wrapped themselves around his waist. In front of him, Taddeo was standing, hugging him. He made his own back as a shield for him. How could he have not realized that?!

“Why…?”

“I am the one who want to ask ‘why’!!!”

“I hate you!”

He scratched Taddeo’s back with the knife, hoping Taddeo would release him. But it only made Taddeo held him even tighter.

“I hate you!!! I hate you!!!!!” he cried as he kept hurting his subordinate with the knife until his back was a bloody mess, but still Taddeo didn’t release him.

“Hate me as you wish! Hurt me as you wish! But please…don’t hurt yourself like this…” Taddeo begged, somehow sounded like he would cry.

Cesare dropped his knife, for the last time he repeated, “I hate you…” and he rested his head on Taddeo’s shoulder, “Never leave my side anymore…”
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Cesare woke up on his bed. The fever had gone, but he barely remembered what happened last night. All he could remember was the pain and he tried killed himself because of it, but someone stopped him from doing so. He couldn’t remember who that someone was, though. Chiaro? It couldn’t be him… Taddeo? He didn’t think that guy could be that gentle.

So many bloodstains… What kind of horrible things had he done last night? Perhaps he had hurt somebody or perhaps he killed somebody… Could it be really Chiaro? He had been really mad of him, until now he still hated him. Could he have accidentally killed him?!

Cesare brought his hands to his head. The thought was overwhelming him that he didn’t realize Taddeo entered his room.

“Are you okay?” Taddeo asked.

“What…happened…last night? Why there are so many bloodstains?” ” Cesare’s voice was shaking.

Taddeo regretted that he didn’t clean the room before he left. But, if he hadn’t treated his wounds soon, he could have died from blood lost. To make it worse, he was poisoned by Cesare’s blood which was staining the knife. Although Cesare didn’t care about him as much as he did for Chiaro, he doubted Cesare would like to hear that he had accidentally killed his subordinate. Until now, the pain and the nausea hadn’t been better. However, it was the second thing he should worry about.

“You tried to kill yourself. You injured yourself quite badly, though the wounds were healed soon enough…” he answered honestly

“Who else then?”

“Ah?”

“Did I hurt someone else?”

He silenced for a while. He knew exactly what his Master was thinking. He could sense that he was worry about something. Cesare must not have been completely unaware of what had happened last night. He might have thought that Chiaro had come and he accidentally had injured him.

Cesare… if you knew it wasn’t him, but me, would you be as worry as now? - He thought sadly

“No.” he answered.

Cesare realized it was no use asking Taddeo this question for that guy would never tell him the truth.

“Don’t lie to me, Volpe…”

“I’m not lying. I had been by your side all the time and there was no way I would let ‘that man’ approached you, not anyone.”

As those words slipped out of his mouth, Taddeo blushed. He could feel his own jealousy and anger in each of them. He turned his back to Cesare, so that his master wouldn’t find out that his face was red.

For quite sometimes, not a single word came out. They both were silenced until Cesare decided to say something.

“Did I…hurt you?” he asked.

Taddeo refused to answer at first, but he realized that Cesare would insist him to tell the truth. Though he would never tell him, Cesare would eventually find out about everything himself.

Taddeo could only sigh at that, “Only because you thought that I was ‘him’.”

Silence again…

Cesare knew he had hurt someone physically aside of himself. For he could tell, the blood that had stained the room was not only the Cantarella. But for now, he wouldn’t force Taddeo to tell him the truth. He had hurt that man more than he had ever thought. He looked so worn out now. Perhaps he hadn’t rested at all since he fell sick!

“Volpe…”

“Yes?”

He wanted to tell him to leave and take some rest,

“Please, don’t leave me…”

But he told him to stay instead…

Owari

Cantarella Theme 2

2008-02-03T23:22:00.000-08:00

Cantarella theme
download

Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

images taken from:
http://cantarella.dokkasou.net

Failure

2008-01-31T01:00:00.000-08:00

An Arthurian Legend poetry

In this moment we’re standing face to face,
I still dream that I could escape my fate.
But as I look into your eyes,
I know I couldn’t
for you don’t believe that I could.

You’ve never trusted me from the very beginning.
You trust everyone,
but not your own son.
I could see it in your eyes
distrust… shame… disappointment…

What makes you think you have the right
to look at me that way?

Is it because you think that I’m not loyal to you?
What makes you worthy of my loyalty?
Of my trust?
When you, yourself, have never trust me?
What makes me unworthy of your trust?

Am I a shame for you, Your Highness?
If I had have a choice,
I would have chosen that I had never existed at the first place.
Unfortunately I have never had any.
You have never given me one.

I have never been able to choose my own life.
It’s you who make the decision in my whole life.
And when you disappointed with your decision,
you discarded my life.
You’ve never know
how I was disappointed in you
not being able to make the right decision
for my death.
I really wish I was dead,
if I haven’t dead already.

You are my liege
and I am your servant.
But I’ve failed you

All I can do is silently apologize
for a thing that is beyond my control.
I know you won’t hear me,
you never hear me.
Your blood in my veins,
your flesh on my bone,
but you could never feel my pain

You are father
and I am your son.
And you’ve failed me
-----------------------------------------------------------------
An Arthurian Legend Poetry by me =p.. Thanks to pendevous-san for beta-reading this.
Mordred's thought when he faced King Arthur in Camlann.

For anyone who doesn't know, Mordred is King Arthur bastard son. He was conceived through an incestuous relationship between Arthur and his half sister, Morgause (It’s not really Arthur fault, though).
Merlin made a prophecy that one day, Arthur and his kingdom would be destroyed by a child who born on May Day (his own son). So, Arthur gathered all children who was born on May Day and put them into a ship. The ship ‘not accidentally’ sank, all babies died except Mordred -_-;;
At the end, Arthur and Mordred really killed each other.

Chaos Legion Theme

2008-01-22T18:34:00.000-08:00

Chaos Legion theme
download

Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Legend of the Dragoon Theme

2008-01-21T19:00:00.000-08:00

Legend of the Dragoon theme
download

Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Ranmaru and Mitsuhide Theme

2008-01-21T00:48:00.001-08:00

Mitsuhide and Ranmaru from Sengoku Musou 2.
download

Images are taken from: koeiwarriors
Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Ina-hime Theme

2008-01-19T19:57:00.000-08:00

Ina-hime from Sengoku Musou 2.
download

Images are taken from: koeiwarriors
Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Cantarella Theme

2008-01-18T20:10:00.000-08:00

Okuni and Oichi Theme

2008-01-18T20:09:00.001-08:00

Okuni and Oichi from Sengoku Musou 2.
download

Images are taken from: koeiwarriors
Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Mitsunari Theme

2008-01-17T09:32:00.001-08:00

Ishida Mitsunari from Sengoku Musou 2.
download

Images are taken from: koeiwarriors
Compatible with Sony Ericson series:
S500, W580, K810, W880, K800, K790, W850
... may be... just try it on your Sony Ericson phones!

Mobile Themes

2008-01-16T04:52:00.000-08:00

Cantarella
Chaos Legion
Legend of the Dragoon
Sengoku Musou

Please do not use the themes for comercial use!
If you want to put it in your site please...

contact me
fujisaku_yuka@yahoo.com

You can ask me to make a Sony Ericson theme for you (whatever your phone type is).
But I cannot guarantee that I'll make it ^^;
Just provide me with the picture

It's Too Late

2008-01-11T19:35:00.000-08:00

A Legend of the Dragoon fanfiction
LoD © Sony

It’s Too Late

For the first time I saw you, I felt nothing…. I thought that was just a coincidence that we could met. I save you because I was in bad mood, I just searched for a fight, and I also sick seeing those thieves tried to molest you.

I’ve never thought that we have met because of destiny. I’ve never thought that we will meet again with you as a sacred sister and I as a bastard villain who kidnapped the queen. I’ve never thought that I would ever did the same thing just like those thieves did…, tricked you…, used you…, and fooled your heart….

But I don’t understand…. Why…? Why did you still protect me? I can’t believe it…! How could you ever risk your life for a person that have betrayed you? Is it because you’re a very sacred person? You’re fool….

You’re so fool…, but your foolishness has made me even more fool. It has made me fall for you, it has made me fall in love with you.

LOVE…, I didn’t understand it at the first. For me it was just one of my tool to get my own ideal. All people who are in love are all fool. They often do many foolish things, sacrifice their ideal or sometimes their life only for that foolish love.

But I know it now… How can they become so foolish…. That’s because love is their most important ideal, more than the other. That’s why they feel no regret to sacrifice everything for it. You’re the one who told me that important thing….

You make me realize that what I did was wrong, bring me to the right path, the way that I should live. I hope, when we meet again, you will find me as one of your allies…

But it’s too late…, ‘coz I could no longer live.

Sorry… Wink…

Black and White

2008-01-10T22:19:00.000-08:00

Just a random guy. teehee... Photoshop CS1 as usual...

Yukimura Animated GIF

2008-01-10T22:18:00.000-08:00

Yukimura from Sengoku Musou.
click the pic to see him blink

Sweet little Yuki!!! XD
I used Photoshop CS1 and Image Ready
Try to steal it and DIE!!!

Tears of Blood

2008-01-10T22:16:00.000-08:00

Victor Delacroix from Chaos Legion.
Colored using Photoshop CS.
My best artwork, perhaps...
It's not that I love this game a lot... The gameplay sucks... But I love the graphic...

Victor Delacroix

2008-01-10T22:08:00.000-08:00

Victor Delacroix from Chaos Legion

Rose and a Wingly

2008-01-10T22:02:00.000-08:00

Rose from Legend of the Dragoon. The man is an original character.

Done with Photoshop CS1

I can't draw woman -_-;;

External Links

2008-01-10T20:01:00.000-08:00

http://www.deviantart.com/
place to put your art, story, poetry, and so on, and so on. Meet friends who also have interest in art

http://www.fanfiction.net/
Read lots of fanfiction, and publish your own. Don't know what is fanfic? Just visit it!

http://www.youtube.com/
watch videos

http://www.quizilla.com/
a great place to waste your time. Quiz, poetry, story, etc., etc.,

http://www.zedge.net/
free mobile utilities

http://www.multiply.com/
free mp3, blog hosting

http://www.blackle.com/
use this a your search engine and save energy!

http://www.pimp-my-profile.com/
lots of blogs layout. Also layout generator

http://www.myflashfetish.com/
free mp3 player for your blog

http://www.freebookspot.com/
free ebook

Fanfiction List

2008-01-10T19:50:00.000-08:00

ARTHURIAN LEGEND

Failure
Mordred's thought when he faced King Arthur in Camlann.
one-shot

CANTARELLA

To be by Your Side
Cesare was ill and Chiaro wasn’t there for him. It’s up to Volpe to take care of him. Volpe/Cesare.
one-shot

ERAGON

Second Chance
Eragon thought Murtagh was dead. But was he really dead? What would Eragon do when he found out that his brother was alive, but broken... Post Inheritance cycle. Slash. EraMur.
chapter 1
chapter 2

FINAL FANTASY VII

Insanity
Post FFVII. Some physicological aspect
one-shot

LEGEND OF THE DRAGOON

It's Too Late
Lloyd thought about Wink near the end of his life
one-shot

STAR OCEAN

Crimson Fate
A story about Albel Nox. About his past, his hard life before becoming the captain of the Black Brigade. Childhood, teenager and … just read.
prologue
chapter 1
chapter 2
chapter 3

Insanity

2008-01-10T19:44:00.000-08:00

Someone told me that this fic is rather hard to follow. So anyone wants to volunteer to be my beta reader?
Final Fantasy VII © Square
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Insanity
A Final Fantasy VII fanfiction

So…, here I am in hell or somewhere else, I don't care. Finally I'm free! I'm DEAD! Thanks to Cloud and his omnislash. I've wished for this for so long, since I was a kid, so I could be free from Hojo, but I couldn't because of mother.

Ah, she's not my mother, that goddamned bitch. I only used her to get my goal, to become 'god', without realizing she was the one who used me.

I was deceived…

Become a god??? Ha..ha..ha.. seems you dream to much, Sephiroth! Who do you think you are? You're not even a human. You're a guinea pig. No! You're more than that…

Jenova's slave…

Hojo's prisoner…

Shinra's pawn…

But I'm no longer theirs 'coz I'm…

DEAD

Hm… I wonder if they are also here. I think the demon is torturing them for their sins. I want to see it. Especially Hojo! May be he is being tortured by the painful mako treatment like what he has done to me. Being injected by billion grams of mako, sounds good… I want him to feel all the pain I've felt,

I want to hear you scream in agony

Cry…

But no one cares

Feel how the cold mako fire burns every part of your body

as the needles pierce through your skin!

I move my feet to search them, may be I can help the devil to torture them. But ah.., I'm being chained. Oh.. it's okay.. just thing the good of not seeing them. Their face would only make you vomit.

Eh…, why there's no devil torturing me? Are they being touch by the story of my sad life? So they put a pity on me? Or… I'm much more evil than them so they afraid of me. He..he..he…

Shush…! Someone is coming! The girl with brown hair whom I killed in the city of the ancients. I feel sorry for her…

She's grinning to me, knife in her hand.

Wait! What do you want to do?! Stop! It hurts!!!

no…

NO…!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

The food fell to the ground as the tied platinum blond man became wild. The plate and glass broke into pieces, so did her heart. Tears started to flow down through the cheeks of the wavy brown haired nurse. He also became like that the last time he saw her. Screaming…, struggling…, crying… like a little boy who is about being punished by his mother for being naughty. She tried to calm him down by embraced him. She whispered something to his ear,

"I'm not going to hurt you…" she said, "And not going to let anyone hurt you anymore!"

------------------------------------------------------------------

Uh…yeah… in this fic Sephy is alive, but being sent to insane asylum. ;; POOR SEPHY…!!! >< (--;;) And Aeris is the nurse.

Crimson Fate 4

2008-01-10T19:31:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer:

Albel: “Yuka will never own me! Muahahahahahahaha…….!”

Yuka: sob
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Crimson Fate
A Star Ocean 3 fanfiction

Chapter 3

“Faster!” the escort yelled to the old man as he whipped him.

Albel felt sorry for him. It seemed the old man wouldn’t last long if the situation continued. They had been forced to walk for a whole day without food or rest.

He had no idea where he was being taken. All he could see was a barren land. He didn’t think there was a town around there. He wondered if they were lost. That wasn’t bad at all; he didn’t need to see his master. He wasn’t a submissive person. He wondered what they would do to him if he wouldn’t submit to them.

His thoughts were shattered once he saw a town. They went there. It was a ghost town. The land was barren and there was only some old construction.

They were being taken to an old construction site. The escort who took them from the village handed them over to the guards there and left.

“From now, you will stay here and work in the mine until someone buys you!” he said harshly, “Go inside, NOW!”

Inside it was very horrible. It appeared that no one ever cleaned the place. He couldn’t withstand the odor. He wanted to vomit.

They were being taken to a small room. There was a mound of clothes, which was being made of jute.

“Get changed, quick!” the guard ordered.

“Here?” one of them asked.

“Of course!”

They remained motionless, especially the women. They didn’t want their private part to be seen by others.

The guard started to become impatient. He whipped them

“Slave doesn’t have privacy! Took your clothes off or I’ll punished you!”

They immediately took them off, afraid to be punished.

Albel hesitatingly took his clothing off. He immediately put on his new clothes. They were even uglier than the old ones and also very uncomfortable. They felt itchy.

After they finished changing, the guard drove them into another room.

Apparently the odor came from this room. The room was so dark and damp. It contained some holding cells. They were very dirty. There was so much human waste lying on the floor, it was disgusting. They wouldn’t tell him to live there, would they? Just being near it had made him want to vomit. The guard led them inside… No…

The guard opened some cells and forced them to get in. Albel had no choice, he had to go inside. He walked carefully so as not to step on the feces.

“You better rest now! ‘Coz starting tomorrow, you must work!” the guard said and left.

Rest? In a place like this!

Suddenly a voice broke his thought, “Hey! So you’re new here.”

Albel turned his head to see the owner of the voice. He was a boy, seemed to be few years older than him. He had a pair of black eyes. His shoulder length hair also had the same color with his eyes. He was wounded badly.

“Please, sit down!”

Albel took a seat beside that boy. He sat down slowly, avoiding the disgusting things on the floor.

That boy realized his awkward attitude, “I see, you haven’t become accustomed with the situation. Don’t worry, you will learn by time.”

Hope so…

“My name is Reiyon, you?”

“…Albel…”

“Hey, Albel! How did you end up here?” he asked.

“…” he didn’t answer. He started to feel annoyed by that boy.

“I see…, you don’t want anyone to know about that… Hm…, may be it was a shame, but you could feel better after letting someone know…”

Feel better! How could someone feel better to let anyone know that he had just killed someone!

Reiyon sighed, “It seems everyone who come here are unlucky persons. I was being sold by my parents few months ago, I hope you aren’t the same.”

Sold? By his own parents? Somehow, he felt lucky his mom never had an intention to sell him even though they were so poor. Mother…, he wonder how she was….

“No!” he answered, “I wasn’t being sold by my parents.”

“Good for you!”

And it would be perfect if there was a father…

You better sleep now, ‘coz I’m not sure that you will be able to sleep if everyone comes back.” Reiyon said.

“Everyone?”

“Well…, we aren’t the only ones who live in this cell”.” He explained, “There are umh… one…two…three…four… … fourteen! Fourteen other people?’

“What!”

His eyes nearly popped out. This small, tiny little cell was being occupied by sixteen people! That was insane!

“So…, where are they now?” he asked.

“They are working at the mine.”

“Why aren’t you with them?”

“Me? To tell you the truth… Few days ago, I tried to escape, but I was being discovered by the guards and they beat me. So I can’t work.”

“They are nice enough to let you stay here for rest?”

“Yeah…, but no work means no food.”

“…” It seemed life would be harder from now. Maybe he really must sleep, hearing that boy’s story made him feel worse.

Albel laid down his head on the hard ground and closed his eyes.

“Xxxxx… yyyyy… zzzzz… xyz”

Oh good…, that boy told him to get some sleep, but he keep babbling, he didn’t listen to him. He really must sleep, but the noise prevented him.

It’s okay…, just don’t mind him.

It didn’t take too long for him to fall asleep. He had been so tired from walking for a whole day. But just as he fell asleep, he was awakened by a bunch of people entering the cell. The narrow cell became full of people. He barely had a space to move.

It seemed it would be hard to sleep in this condition.

This would be a long… long… night.

Crimson Fate 3

2008-01-10T19:30:00.000-08:00

! The italics are thought
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Crimson Fate
A Star Ocean 3 fanfiction

Chapter 2

Disclaimer:

Albel: “Yuka don’t own me!”

Yuka: sob

The guards came once they heard a scream.

“What happened!” one of them asked.

No one dared to answer. They only looked at their unconscious friend. The guard approached him and found out that he wasn’t breathing.

“Who did this!”

They remained silent until a boy exclaimed, “It’s him!” he pointed at Albel whose face was full of doodles.

Albel stepped back, “Wait… he can’t be… he can’t be dead… I only gave him a weak punch…” his voice was shaking. He was scared. No… it can’t be…!

“Boy, you’re coming with us!” The guard grabbed his arm, but Albel drew it off.

He ran towards the boy’s body. He shook it as he screamed, “Hey! Stop pretending that you’re dead!” but he didn’t wake up.

The guards removed his hands from the boy. They forcibly dragged him off. Albel struggled to get free, but it was useless. They were too strong for him.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
It was already 4 p.m. Albel usually had made it home before 2’ o clock. Arlina was starting to worry about her son. Did something bad happen?

She decided to look for him. On her way, she saw a crowd. She approached it to see what happened. She saw Gohh’s mother crying in the middle of the crowd, holding her dead son.

So it was true! Something bad has happened! Did a mad serial killer came and killed the children! No… What had happened to her Albel…!

She encouraged herself to ask someone about him, “Excuse me, have you seen my son?”

Everyone gave her a sinister look. When Gohh’s mother noticed her presence, she screamed wildly and tried to attack her. The people there tried to hold her back. They told Arlina to leave.

“Wh…what happened…?”

“Just go away!” one of them answered.

“Bu-…”

“Your son has just killed hers! And you still have a face to come here? Your son is in the prison! Now leave!”

What…? Albel killed someone! It can’t be!

Actually she had many question in her head to be asked. But since they had already driven her away, she had to leave. Besides, she must find the truth by herself. She went to the prison.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Albel sat in the corner of his cell, burying his dirty face into his knees. He regretted what he had done. If only he had a bit more patience.

He knew what punishment was waiting for him. People in his village didn’t bother themselves by feeding the convicts. They would sell him as a slave. It was a cruel punishment since that meant there would be no hope of freedom.

His mother must be worried sick about him. He wanted to run into her embrace and told her how scared he was. Not because he scared of being a slave, he scared that he wouldn’t be able to see her again. He wanted to see her for what may be the last time they ever saw each other. But he had no face to meet her. He was so ashamed, ashamed to her, to everybody, to himself. He wasn’t a good boy

Would she be mad? Would she punish him?

His thought shattered once a warden came and said, “Boy, your mother visits you!”

What! No! He wasn’t ready to meet her. What if she found the doodles on his face! He didn’t want her to see them. She mustn’t see them!

He quickly turned himself to face the wall just a few seconds before he heard his mother called his name.

“Albel…” she felt her heart being pierced by thousand knifes seeing her son behind the iron bars. Tears began to flow down her cheeks.

“…” he remained silent. He knew she was crying, but he didn’t know how to act.

“Albel?”

Though he was scared, he knew he shouldn’t lie to her. Still hiding his face, he answered, “I…it’s true…”

Arlina was shocked by the answer. So it was true… Her son was a murderer. She felt many emotions mixed around in her heart. Anger, sadness, disbelief, disappointment. In one side, she really wanted to hit him. But in the other side, she couldn’t do it.

Finally she decided to keep herself calm. She believed Albel had a reason for doing so.

“Let me see your face…” she said.

Albel shook his head.

“It’s okay… I won’t be mad. I believe you have a reason for doing so.”

“No… I can’t…”

“Why?”

They hadn’t finished their conversation, but the warden came, “Your time is over!” he said.

“Please! Just a few more minutes… I haven’t seen his face yet…” she begged

“He doesn’t want you to see him. Now, go!”

“Please!” but the warden didn’t care. They dragged her by force.

Albel could hear his mother plead to see his face. It pierced his heart. He ran to hold her up, but the iron bars blocked him.

“But believe me, mom! I really didn’t mean to kill him!” he shouted as loud as he could, hoping that she could hear him.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
She heard him. She heard very clear what he said. She wanted to tell him that she believed him, but they had already dragged her out.

She must help him. But how? The only way was to buy him, but she didn’t have nearly enough money.

She decided to meet the mayor, hoping that he could give her some solution. She planned to borrow some money to buy her son. He was the one who would lend her some money. She knew he wasn’t a good person. He was a usurer. She wasn’t sure that he would let her borrow again since she hadn’t repaid her last debt. Or if he didn’t want to lend the money, she hoped he could lighten Albel’s punishment, since he was the one who should manage everything that happened in the village. But he didn’t really care about that. That’s why, usually, there was no trial for the crime. He was too lazy to make that kind of thing. All criminals would be punished as a slave without trial.

She knocked on the door, and then she waited. No one answered it. Then she knocked again, but still no one opened it for her. She hadn’t given up. She knocked it again and again as she called him.

At last, one of his servants came out. “What is it! The master is already asleep!”

Sleep! It’s just barely six o’ clock! “B…but it’s just barely six o’ clock.”

“The master decides when he sleeps.”

“Can you wake him up, please? I have an important issue to discuss with him.” She asked.

“NO! Do you want him to kill me?”

“Okay then… I’ll wake him up myself!”

“Wh…what…! Wai-…”

She shouted as loud as he could, “Mr. Mayor! Wake up! Or I won’t pay the debt!”

It only took a few seconds to summon the fat man out.

“What is it! Don’t you know not to interrupt a man’s sleep?”

“Might I ask a favor of you, Sir?”

“If that’s about the boy, NO!” he stated.

“Please…” she pleaded.

“I said NO! Just a few minutes a go, that woman came and told me that she wants me to “take care” of the boy who killed her son as soon as possible. I also have taken her money. Unless you can out-pay her, which I doubt you can, your son will leave this village at 3 a.m. together with the other criminals! Goodnight!” They went inside and slammed the door.

She still wanted to beg, but she knew it was useless. There was no way he would change his mind after he got that woman’s money, and there was no way she could pay him more.

Once again, she ran to the prison to meet her son, but she came only to be dragged away once again. The warden didn’t allow her no matter how she pleaded, cried, and screamed.
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“Boy, it’s time to go!” a guard said as he unlocked the door.

“N…now!” Albel knew that the time would eventually come, but he didn’t expect that it would be this fast. He hadn’t even said anything to his mother.

“Of course! Out!” he yelled and gestured him to come out of the cell.

Albel followed his instruction. He followed the guard who led him to the back exit. Outside, the other convicts waited. Far from what he expected, they weren’t so much like criminals at all. Many of them were children, the others old men and women. He wondered what kind of crime they could possibly commit. It must have something to do with money.

“Line up!”

They followed the order. None of them were trying to escape, afraid of the price they would pay for that act. The guards tied their hands together to the neck of the person in front of them. After they finished, two guards took them to leave the village.

Albel kept looking back, hoping that he would see his mother. But he didn’t see her. She didn’t come. May be she was mad. Right then, he made a vow, that he would become a great man before she saw him again.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Please don't get shocked if you find his mother's name is different from he first chapter. I tried to change it, but not sure if I didn't miss any.

Crimson Fate 2

2008-01-10T19:29:00.000-08:00

!!! The italics are thought

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Crimson Fate
A Star Ocean 3 fanfiction

Chapter 1

Disclamer: Star Ocean 3 © SquareEnix

“Albel! Albel!”

“Ouch!” the boy opened his eyes when he felt a piece of wood struck his back.

“How many time I have told you… DO NOT sleep in the class!!!”

“Sorry sir…” he answered with sleepy eyes. Damn! The thought about his father had made his eyes stayed open all the night. It happened a lot.

Everyone laughed at him. Albel didn’t care, he had been used to be laughed by other children in the village. It wasn’t because he often slept in the class, it was because he was the only kid who was wearing ugly clothes to school since the others came from at least a middle class family.

“Hey Albel! Was your mom not at home so you scared to sleep ‘coz no one accompanied you in bed?” one of the boys mocked him.

“What?! Albel is still sleeping with his mommy?” the other asked with an insulting tone. Actually he knew it was because he didn’t have his own room.

“Huh?! You don’t know about that?!”

The insults wouldn’t end if the teacher didn’t interrupt them. Albel just shut his ears. He shouldn’t care about it. It was just a little problem that often happened.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

The school time was over. Albel had been waited for that time. Being with his schoolmates had made him sick. As usual, he took a small passageway home so he wouldn’t meet anyone. But this time he couldn’t just go home easily since some boys blocked his way.

“Can’t you just let me pass?” he sighed.

“This street is only for nobles, a tramp like you shouldn’t go this way.”

“This is funny! Yesterday, I went home through this way…” I’ll laugh if I see a noble ever wants to go through this narrow way.

“You have broken the rule! I, Gohh, captain of the black brigade, shall punish you!” A fat boy who seemed to be the leader stated. His name is Gohh. He was the richest boy in the village. Every kid there submitted to him, except for Albel. First, because his pride didn’t allow him, the second, because they needed a “villain” to be bullied and Albel would be their victim.

He hated the time they were playing as “hero”. What was that black brigade, storm brigade, dragon brigade, frog brigade, … brigade, whatever brigade it was, he didn’t care, it brought him no good.

“Yes, Sir Gohh…” he said with a teasing tone, “But I don’t care, ‘coz I’m not one of your stupid brigade members.”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing.”

“Really?! I heard you said ‘stupid’”

“That’s not important”

“Not important?!!! You have committed a great crime!!! We shall punish you!!!”

“Can’t you just keep your dream for yourself Gohh?! Stop bothering me!” he exclaimed

“You’re jealous aren’t you?”

“What?”

“Because my father is a black brigade high rank soldier, someday I can easily enter the military.” Gohh said with an arrogant tone.

“For what I must jealous of someone who is proudly use his father as a backing?” Albel calmly returned everything to them. He was quite expert in debate. He didn’t want to fight, because if one of them got hurt, their parents would avenge them. If that happened, his mother would be the victim. He didn’t want that thing happened. His mother had suffered enough. He mustn’t let her suffer more. But he also couldn’t just let himself being bullied without resisting. He would never obey them!

“Boss, may be it’s because he doesn’t have a father so he doesn’t know every boy’s dream.” One of Gohh’s followers helped his boss against Albel.

“You!”

“Hey, Dirke, you’re as clever as always! Look! He is angry now!” another boy commended. He stared at Albel with eyes full of insults.

“Even your own father’s name you don’t know. Stupid!” Gohh started again.

“I’m not stupid!!! That’s because my mother didn’t tell me! I don’t want to know that bastard name either!” Calm down Albel… It’s nothing…

“Whoa… You even called him a bastard… You must be really hate him. Did your mother not teach you to respect your father?”

“She did! But for this thing, I won’t obey her!”

“He is alive, but you don’t know anything about him. You mustn’t blame others for this, blame yourself!”

“Why I must blame myself?!” Albel asked angrily.

“Because he doesn’t want you.”

“Shut up…!!!” Finally, Albel lost his patience. He tried to punch Gohh, but even the fat boy could dodge that emotional punch. The other boys quickly restrained him. They held his arms, Albel struggled to get free.

“It’s time to teach you some lessons.” Albel spat on his opponent face. Gohh became really angry. He hit Albel again and again. Each blow left a bruise on his soft skin. They gave Gohh pleasure when seeing it, especially the one on his cheek.

“Should I make a mark on this precious girly face?” Gohh brought a pen tip close to Albel’s face. “The ink is permanent, it won’t leave your face no matter how hard you try to wash it for at least a week.” He smirked and started to make doodles on Albel’s face as it was a piece of paper.

Albel shook his head, trying to avoid the pen. But it was useless, he even got his cheek being scratched by the sharp pen tip. Blood dripped from the wound.

“Oops…! You better calm down, the ink will only take a week to vanish. But If you keep yourself struggling like that, this pen can make a permanent mark!”

But Albel didn’t stop, he kept struggling. Gohh grew tired with his game since Albel’s face also had full with doodles.

“Enough with your struggle! I won’t draw anymore!” Gohh gave his friends a command to release him.

Albel approached the fat boy, “It doesn’t matter he wants me or not. I don’t want him either. I don’t need such an egoistic person to be my father.” He stated, then he walked to leave them.

“You can’t say he is an egoist.”

Albel just ignored those trouble makers, he didn’t want to debate with them anymore. He just wanted them to know what was in his mind. He didn’t need a father. He just wanted them to know that. It didn’t matter what they would say next.

But…

“Who wants a child from a whore?!”

What did they just say?

“What did you just say?”

“Whore…, bitch!”

Didn’t they just call his mom a whore?!!!

He burned with anger. He could hold himself no longer. “You… You my insult me…, but don’t insult my mother…!!!” He struck the boy. This time it didn’t miss the target. The fat boy fell, his head hit against the wall behind him. Everyone dropped their jaw. They couldn’t believe, that thin boy knocked their fat leader unconscious? Albel himself hardly believe that. That was too far from what he expected. Was he that strong? Or his opponent was too weak?

A boy approached Gohh, trying to wake him up. But he didn’t wake up, he didn’t move. The boy saw blood flew down the wall. He startled. He put his finger in front of Gohh’s nose. He wasn’t breathing.

“M…MURDER…..!!!!!”

Crimson Fate 1

2008-01-10T19:25:00.000-08:00

This is my first Star Ocean fic. It’s about Albel’s past. Err…, his hard life before becoming the captain of the Black Brigade. Well…, it’s only a fic, my own imagination. I‘ve only play it once (and I haven’t finished it T_T), so I don’t know if Woltar had told Fayt about his past, because Albel is the one who came to help Fayt in Training Facilities. I didn’t see the event if I wanted him in my party after entered the Eternal Sphere. So…, it may be different from the original, once again it’s just a fanfic. But I DO know about Glou Nox, I read about him in the dictionary. He will be a part of this fic. Oh yeah…, there won’t be Albel saying maggots AT FIRST…

I apologize if there are some grammatical error in this fic since English isn’t my language.

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Crimson Fate
A Star Ocean 3 fanfiction

Prologue

Disclamer: I don’t own Albel :’(

“Mom, who is my father?” that’s the question which the little boy used to ask his mother, Arlina. But he had never got a satisfying answer. This time is also the same.

“Albel, your father is a very busy man, he…”

Before she finished her word, Albel cut her, “Mom, You know what I ask is his name!”

“Albel, Am I not enough for you?” as she said that tears dripped through her cheek. It made his son felt guilty for making his mother cry.

“It’s… It’s… not like that…just…” He tried to explain, of course she is more than enough for him, she was the only one he had in this world.

“I know…, sorry, I can’t tell you by now, but someday you’ll know it.” She said as she wiped away her tears and stroked his hair, “Understood?”

The boy nodded sadly.

“Oh…, why don’t you play outside with your friends?” she tried to leave the topic.

“No, I think I want to study, I have a test tomorrow” he said, actually it was because he had no friend. His mom didn’t know about it.

“Okay…”

Albel went into his room. The small room belongs to him and his mother. Since they were so poor their house only had one small bedroom without any bed since it had been sold in order to get a small amount of money. His mother income as a laundress wasn’t enough to fulfill their needs.

His mother once told him that his father is an important person, they mustn’t bother him because he was busy enough. But…, how could the man abandoned his family for his job? He didn’t even send any money. They must pay the debt before the end of the month or they would be kicked from their small house, that time they would become a vagrants. Albel wonder if his father would even care.

Albel had told his mom that he had decided to quit from school and started to work a whatever. At least it would lighten her burden. He felt ashamed always late to pay the school fee. But she forbade him. She said be he must learn, become a great person, so he could meet his father. Who cares? He only cares about his mother, the only one who cares about him.

He really wanted to know him. He wanted to know who is the man who dares to do this to them. He hates him! He hates him for abandoning his family, hates him for making his mother crying so often, hates him for letting them sleeping without a mattress, hates him for letting them wearing worn out clothes, hates him for everything, for he wanted his love so deeply…

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Now…, tell me what do you think? Please…, pretty (handsome or whatever) please….!!!! Err…, I know it is short…, it’s just the prologue. Oh yeah… also tell me how do you think about my grammar. It will help me to improve my English. Or anyone want to volunteer to be my beta-reader? Once again I apologize if there are many errors. Please your review…

About Me

2008-01-10T19:16:00.000-08:00

Nearly forget to introduce myself

Name: Fujisaku Yuka (of course not my real name)
Age: 22
Hobby: internet, playstation, manga, fanfic
Favourite Manga: Haven't read anything for quite sometimes
Favourite Games: Final Fantasy VII, Sengoku Musou 2, Resident Evil 4, Shadow Hearts 2
Favourite Band: DIR EN GREY
Favorite Album: Uroboros

contact me: fujisaku_yuka@yahoo.com

Hi!

2008-01-10T19:15:00.000-08:00

This blog is still under construction.
The template is Chiaro from Higuri You's beautiful manga, Cantarella.
It's not that I like him, though. The truth is... I HATE him!!!
It's just that this pic is easy to edit -_-;;